i stand, i shout, i impact.

You Gave Me Wings As I Fell.

Posted in Uncategorized by sheryberry on December 30, 2008

CHAPTER 3.

So close to tears, wanting to give up, I felt all alone…


“Isaac!” I exclaimed.

Hey…it’s been ages, how’ve you been?”

I arched my eyebrow. “Whaddya think?”


Well, yet another day had passed since Ben had been put in the intensive care unit. One who was Heaven sent. An angel when I was in my darkest moment. Tears shrouded my vision, blurring the image in front of my eyes. The soft browns and creams of the furniture blended together, turning the whole room into one big mass of cream.

As I sat on the reclining chair in my musty old living room alone, I reminisced about the past. How Ben would always be there, with his feet propped up, reading the daily news next to the cozy fireplace. There might have been that generic family pet missing, as always mentioned in Disney stories but we were a happy pair all the same.

I traced my finger around the mug stains on the coffee table that had now worn onto its surface lovingly as I blinked back the tears that threatened to spill out. Ah, the numerous times I reprimanded him for not using a coaster when he drank his usual Sunday morning cup of coffee. How I would give everything and anything, just to be able to do that one more time. Not so much the reprimanding but just seeing him would make my now deflated heart robust once again.

Isaac was an old love. One whom I left behind ages ago. He was my first, a player, as I foolishly did not recognize as then. It was a relationship that I was emotionally scarred by for life. Nothing could ever replace your first love, as they always say. How true those words were, for every time I saw Isaac, my heart wrenched with pain from old memories. My first date, my first hand hold, my first hug and my first kiss. Those were the firsts of my future. He stole them away from me and played me out. That other woman came into the picture.

Well, that was the past. Now is now. Ben was laying in there, my new love, my soul mate. I couldn’t watch someone I loved so much just slip through my fingers. Yet, there was little I could do but wait.

It was time I went to the hospital.

I gathered my things and made sure the padlock was secured properly.

Then, I promptly left for my second home. Greenvale Hill Hospital.

Once Upon A Heart Ache.

Posted in Uncategorized by sheryberry on December 30, 2008

CHAPTER 2.

My fairytale just wasn’t meant to be.


“It’s going to be okay.” James whispered in my ear.


I turned my head to look into those amazing gray eyes of his that sparkled whenever he laughed. I nodded and smiled weakly.

“I sure hope so.” I whispered hoarsely.

As I turned my head to look back at my beloved, James’s hand slipped onto my waist. A little shocked, I stiffened. He must have noticed, because he let go.

Clearing his throat awkwardly, he asked, “Do you want a cup of hot tea or anything?”

“I’d rather just stand here and watch him.” I replied softly.

He nodded. “I understand. I’ll leave you alone for awhile then.”

Somehow, all I could remember was standing at that window and watching Ben. The next thing I know, I’m on a foreign sofa.

“James?” I called, bewildered.

He sauntered into the room.


James’s P.O.V

Y’know, she looks real cute when she’s sleeping. I can’t bear to see her like this…DUDE! She’s your best friend! I mentally slapped myself. Ah, sleeping beauty has awoken.


“Looks like sleeping beauty’s up! Good morning sleepy head!”

“What happened?” I rubbed my eyes.

“Don’t worry babe, you kinda fell asleep against the glass, so I carried you to the nearest sofa.” He chuckled softly.

“Oh, thanks James.” I half smiled.

James was always there for me.

“How’s Ben doing?”

“He’s still in a coma.” James replied quietly.

I stood up and went in search of Ben’s room.

“Oh! Mr. and Mrs. Callum!” I said, astonished.

‘They’d never shown much concern for Ben but I guess that once your only child is in ICU, you’d visit him.’ I thought to myself.

Nicole!” Mrs. Callum exclaimed. “How are you, my dear? Why, I haven’t seen you in absolutely ages! My, my, you’ve grown even more beautiful! Hasn’t she now, Thomas?”

I swear, when she speaks, you can literally hear the italics in her sentences.

“Ah, yes. Miss Evans. A pleasure to see you once again.” Mr. Callum gave my hand a firm shake.

‘Mrs. Callum always seemed to favour me more than Mr. Callum did.’ I pondered.

“I do hope Ben will wake soon. I just can’t bear to see him like this, and I’m sure you can’t either, Nicole, for you were here all night.”

I gulped. How did they know?

“Mr. Tresor told us.” said Mr. Callum, as if reading my mind.

Ah, should have known. James.

A doctor walked into the room.

“Mr. and Mrs. Callum? Miss Evans?”

“Yes, doctor. Doctor, pardon my lack of patience, but how is he?” I almost grabbed the doctor’s coat sleeve.

“Well, I’m afraid that I have some bad news…Mr. Callum’s condition is not very stable and unfortunately, it has been confirmed that the head injuries he sustained are severe. I’m afraid Mr. Callum won’t be awake for quite some time.”

I didn’t know what to do. Crying and praying at the same time, I sunk onto the sofa.

‘Please God,’ I prayed silently. ‘Save him.’

A hand, holding a cup of hot cocoa suddenly appeared in front of my face. I looked up and saw James, who was attempting to smile. I smiled weakly and shook my head. I had absolutely no appetite.

“But Nic,” James sighed in exasperation, “You’ve got to get some food inside you.”

“No thanks, James. I really can’t…”
“But Nic—” James protested.

Slightly irritated, I stood up.

”Look James, I really appreciate your concern, but I just…I just can’t okay?” I cut him off.

“Fine…but promise me you’ll eat something later, okay?” James prompted.

“I’ll try.” I sighed.


“Cookie?” James offered, about two hours later.

“Okay…” I took one out from the Famous Amos bag he was carrying and started nibbling.

Once I tasted the cookie, I realized that I actually was really hungry. I didn’t say anything about it though, because at the same time, I didn’t want to eat at all.

“Whatcha thinking about?” James asked, head cocked to one side.

“Ben.”

“Yeah…you really miss him, huh?”

“Yeah…I really, really do.”

Tears threatened to jump out.

‘No, Nic, pull yourself together, come on. You’ve got to be strong for
Ben.” I scolded myself in my mind.

I stood up and brushed the crumbs off my jeans and dusted my hands.

“I’m going to see Ben.” I informed James.

Mouth too full of cookie, he mumbled an audible, “Mmmm,” and nodded.

I peered through the window and watched Ben breathe. He was fighting so hard to stay alive and I knew it.

“Dear God, please give Ben the strength.” I prayed under my breath.

Suddenly, tears came flowing out again and I couldn’t hold them back. I rubbed my temples in an effort to ease the pain.

‘What did Ben do to deserve this?’ I thought. ‘What have we all done to deserve possibly losing Ben?’

I was joined in that corridor by a familiar face.

“Nicole?”

“Isaac!” I exclaimed.

“Hey…it’s been ages, how’ve you been?”

I arched my eyebrow. “Whaddya think?”

A Familiar Past.

Posted in Uncategorized by sheryberry on December 30, 2008

CHAPTER ONE.

Why did I let myself believe that miracles could happen?


I sighed heavily and forced my hands to prop my head up. As I rested my chin in my palm, I picked up my coffee cup and took a deep breath. Ah, the aroma of freshly brewed coffee in the morning is heavenly. The first few rays of dawn streamed through the translucent curtains and fell softly on the window sill. The tones of light pink and orange complimented each other perfectly, giving off a beautiful peach hue.

“Thanks for the coffee, Dar–” Then I remembered.

“–ling.” I finished with a sigh.

The tears in my eyes pricked, stung and threatened to flow out. I shook my head–hard. There was no way I was going to cry.

Come on, Nic, pull yourself together. It’s no use crying. He’s gone. Really gone.


Flashback.

I kissed his cheek and watched him as he got onto his motorbike and sped away.

“Drive safely!!” I yelled after him.

He gave me a quick wave and then all that was left was a cloud of smoke. I sputtered. Still coughing, I turned on my heel and walked back into our humble abode.

Seeing as I had an appointment with James, my childhood best friend and closest confidante before I met Ben, I decided to shower and change into something decent before I met him at the ice-cream parlor.

After changing in and out of about five different outfits, I finally settled on a baby blue stretch halter tee and black cargos.

I started humming the Friends theme song whilst I floated down the stairs, thinking of how much fun the two of us would have, chatting and catching up with each other. After all, it had been about a year since the two us met up.

My hand had just enclosed around the door handle when the phone rang and an unfamiliar female voice rung through the receiver.

“Hello, may I speak to a Nicole, please?”

“Speaking.”

“Miss…?”

“Evans. Nicole Evans. Is something wrong?” I spoke, panic rising in my voice.

“Please be calm, Miss Evans. We would like to confirm if you have any relationship with a Mr. Ben Callum?”

“Yes, I’m his…girlfriend. Did anything happen to him?”

“ Your name was the first one we found on his recent calls list. Could you please come down to Greenvale Hill Hospital? I’m afraid Mr. Callum has been involved in a road accident.”

I stiffened and held back my tears.

”I-I’ll be right there.”

By a miracle, a cab was just passing by our home as I stepped on to sidewalk. I quickly flagged it and climbed in.

“G-Greenvale Hill Hospital, please.”

“You okay there, Love?” the driver asked with a hint of concern in his voice.

“S-Someone’s been in an accident.”

“Oh dear, better get you there fast and safely then.”

I nodded gratefully. Realizing the time, I remembered the ice-cream parlor appointment. I sped dialed James’s number and…

“Hello? James?”

“Nic! Typical queen of vanity! Always late!”

“James…Ben…he…”

“Nic,” He got serious, “What’s wrong?”

“Ben…in hospital…road accident…”

“Oh gosh. Which hospital?”

“G-Greenvale.”

“I’ll be right there. Stay strong.”

Click.

I stared into blank space. This couldn’t be happening.

“Miss…we’re here.”

“Thank you.” I paid him and rushed into the hospital through the main entrance.

James was already there.

“C’mon babe, he’s on the fourth floor.”

“Okay,” I whispered, “Thanks for coming.”

“No problem.”

Once we reached the fourth floor, I went straight to the information counter.

“WHERE IS HE?!” I yelled in the face of the bewildered, bespectacled secretary who was eating a cheese sandwich. Caught by surprise, she practically dumped the sandwich on herself.

“Uhm…sorry.” I winced.

She pushed up her spectacles with her index finger and said, “May I know which patient you are enquiring about, Miss…?”

“Miss Evans. Nicole Evans.” I repeated for the second time that day. “I’m looking for Mr. Ben Callum.”

She was a middle-aged lady, with a facial expression as hard as stone. Upon hearing this though, her expression seemed to soften slightly.

“I see. Please come with me, Miss Evans.”

She led me through a series of corridors and into the intensive care unit.

‘God, no…’ I thought to myself.

We stopped in front of a window. I peered in and there, undoubtedly, was Ben. Half his face was wrapped in bandages. I gazed at him as his chest rose up and down rhythmically. Even through the glass, I could hear the incessant beeping of the life support machine. I could feel the tears well up in my eyes. I let them fall.

‘How could this happen?’ I thought, as I wept silently.

Suddenly, I felt a pair of strong arms wrap around me.

“It’s going to be okay.” James whispered in my ear.

The Loo.

Posted in Uncategorized by sheryberry on December 30, 2008

there was once lived a girl who just loved the rain
in the night, in the day, in her joy, in her pain
so one fine day i walked up to her
and asked her if she would make me sir

she said yes of course i now knight you dear
so we carried on in envy of my peers
marriage was next in line for me
and i saw her at the altar dressed in a tee

nothing but a tee

da da da da da da da da da
polished my shoes and jumped in the pool
grabbed her hand and pulled her too
made her needa go to the loo
da da da da da da da da da
made her needa go to the looooooo

-interlude-

and i said
hey mary hey what’s up
you’re so hot you make me drop
hey mary
you’re hot
yeah mary

hey mary you’re so fine
you’re so fine you blow my mind
hey mary
hey hey
hey mary

-pick it up; bass progressively stronger-

yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah
da da da da da da da da da

so we went on to have about 10 grandkids
with her as an old hag i crashed into the pits
i wished that mary were just as hot
but that’s just life oh well back to my pot

da da da da da da da da da
one day she nagged and it didnt stop
til i pushed her in the pool and made her belly pop
she was rushed to the hospital’s A&E
i couldn’t care less she was no use to me

da da da da da da da da da
while she was in there i found someone
who was young virgin jenny with great big guns
she was a girl who just loved the rain
in the night, in the day, in her joy, in her pain
so one fine day i walked up to her
and asked her if she would make me sir

and here we go again

da da da da da da da da da
polished my shoes and jumped in the pool
grabbed her hand and pulled her too
made her needa go to the loo
da da da da da da da da da
made her needa go to the looooooo

the looooooooooooo.

Tagged with: , ,

this will be a blog based on sporadic inspiration.

Posted in Uncategorized by sheryberry on December 30, 2008

that means no regular updates, just random updates whenever i feel the urge to. but i won’t die. there can be as many as 10 posts a day, or 1 in 10 days. it all depends. i’m super tired today, so i’ll just post a song that’s been on my mind the whole way.

Next To You by Jordin Sparks

okay. ciao. ♥

Retardedness.

Posted in Uncategorized by sheryberry on December 29, 2008

I have decided to move to wordpress for fun! Huzzah! 😀
In honor of this extraordinary event, I will post some random crap!

a photo!

it took quite sometime to get this shot.

it took quite sometime to get this shot.

a poem!

The Song of Wandering Aengus. – W.B Yeats

I went out to the hazel wood,
Because a fire was in my head,
And cut and peeled a hazel wand,
And hooked a berry to a thread;
And when white moths were on the wing,
And moth-like stars were flickering out,
I dropped the berry in the stream
And caught a little silver trout.

When I had laid it on the floor,
I went to blow the fire aflame,
But something rustled on the floor,
And some one called me by my name:
It had become a glimmering girl
With apple blossom in her hair
Who called me by my name and ran
And faded through the brightening air.

Though I am old with wandering
Through hollow lands and hilly lands,
I will find out where he has gone,
And kiss her lips and take her hands;
And walk among long dappled grass,
And pluck till time and times are done
The silver apples of the moon,
The golden apples of the sun.

a song!

Energy by Keri Hilson

okay i feel so retarded now.

BYE. 😀